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'Amends' chapter 7

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A/N: It's here, folks. The moment you've been waiting for: the epic angsty chapter! I posted a rough draft on deviantART, and now, it's time. Prepare yourselves.

The title comes from the song, "Calling to the Night" by Natasha Farrow. It's the theme song for Metal Gear Solid: Portable Ops, and is also featured on Super Smash Bros. Brawl (which I have unlocked the song; my friend code is on my FFnet profile if you want to Brawl. Which I actually heard Nintendo is making a successor for the Wii ALREADY. In HD and all that stuff.  And there will be a new Smash game...hopefully no need for friend codes.

Warnings: Bloody violence, partial nudity (again xD) and MAJOR TEARJERKER ALERT. Better get your tissue boxes on hand, folks.

Disclaimer: I own neither the Star Ocean series, the Metal Gear Solid series, the Super Smash Bros. series, or the song, "Calling to the Night".

And I dunno if Roak has a moon. I just went this way as usual for convenience xD


_______________________


What It Means to Make Amends
Chapter 7
C a l l i n g to the N i g h t


Crowe lay in his bed, unable to sleep. Staring at the ceiling as the dim moonlight sifted through the windows, he mused, I've already gotten too involved with the people here on Roak...what will happen if I cause another incident similar to what happened on that Alternate Earth? That is why....that is why I cannot stay here any longer.

Climbing out of bed, he walked out of his room very quietly so as not to wake Meracle and Sarah. After determining the coast was clear, he walked out of the inn.

Tatroi was so much more different in the dead silence of night than in the plain daylight. Every light in each house was off, leaving only the streets dimly illuminated by streetlights. The pale blue moon shone in the sky, amidst twinkling stars and thin clouds that floated past, concealing the moon and revealing it once again as the clouds passed, giving the night a dream-like feel. The only thing that kept the night from being totally silent was the sound of crickets chirping. The cool nocturnal breeze blew as Crowe wandered the streets to the town square, standing in front of the statue.

Looking around, Crowe saw that everyone else was still asleep, so he wouldn't have to worry about anyone seeing him use his communicator. I'm so sorry, Eleyna, he thought. But...it looks like I couldn't find my purpose after all....it was all a waste. Pulling the communicator out of his pocket, he dialed a number and shouted into his commicator.

"Hello! Is anyone receiving this frequency? This is Crowe F. Almedio, former Captain of the SRF-001 Aquila! I am currently located on the planet Roak! My coordinates: 079-538-74410-2! If anyone reads me, you will know where to find me!" After finishing his transmission, he looked at the screen on his communicator, which displayed only two words:

"Transmission Successful."

The message was simple, but it carried a great deal of meaning in it. He was making a definite change; it would be one that he could not take back once the plan took action. All the feelings that had haunted him since his earliest hours on Roak about whether or not he truly belonged.

I guess this is it, Crowe contemplated, looking toward the stars. The minute anyone in the SRF finds this transmission, they'll come find me...and then...I'll have to leave. It's what's best for this planet anyway. He put the communicator away and began to walk back toward the inn, only to find Meracle standing there right as he turned around.

"Meracle..." Crowe muttered. "What are you doing up?"

"I could ask you the same thing," Meracle replied, looking at him curiously.

Crowe sighed, and said, "Well, why don't we just sit down for a second?" He walked over to a nearby bench and sat down. Meracle did the same.

"What is it?" Meracle asked the red-haired human, who was staring into the stars.

"Hmm?" Crowe looked at her. "Well...a lot has been on my mind."

"There has been a lot going on..."  Meracle looked down for a second, and said, "You know, Crowe...I believe I forgot to tell you this. Edge, myself, and the others met Sarah here in Tatroi, and well...Edge was still very upset over what happened to that Alternate Earth at that time. He kept saying that he shouldn't get involved, because he was afraid of what could happen to Roak..."

Those words struck a chord in Crowe's mind. Edge...felt that way? That's...that's exactly how I feel right now.

Meracle continued, "But once Edge met Lady Eleyna...I can't quite explain it, but he really changed...of course, after we saved Sarah and left the Purgatorium, something must have happened to Faize that he began to change, too....but for the worse."

"I see....I still feel kind of bad things had to end that way for Faize..." he trailed off, remembering the brief time he had spent with the Eldarian vivdly.

"No...It's alright," Meracle said. "It has been a while now."

"Can I ask you something, Meracle?" Crowe questioned.

"Yeah?" she asked, tilting her head.

"Do you....miss Edge, Reimi, and the others?"

"Yeah....but somehow, I have faith that I'll see all of them again...like, remember that day, when I played my ocarina? I'm sure the melody will reach all of them, and maybe we'll see each other once again..."

"...Thanks," Crowe said. "It's pretty cold out...we'd better head back to the inn."

"Yeah..."

As Crowe and Meracle began to walk back toward the inn, Meracle saw one of the houses' lights come on. "Huh? What's going on over there?" she wondered. The scarlet-haired young Earthling and the blue-haired Lesser Fellpool girl began to walk over to the house, when all of a sudden, the clashing of blades and deafening screams broke the near-silence. Once that happened, they immediately ran toward the house. Crowe recognized the house.

"That's....!"

"Oh no...where Mikhail and Fionne were staying?" Meracle asked.

"Yeah..."

Walking over to the house slowly, Crowe signaled Meracle to stop and hide, as he could see the door opening. After he hid, he stealthily glanced over his hiding spot to see a burly, tall, bald man step out, covered in blood.

Oh God...please...don't let it be...

The man looked around. Crowe immediately resumed hiding, but before he hid once again, he saw the man's eyes....cold, devoid of life, almost giving an impression of being possessed by a demon.

It's him.....the man we saw before heading to Tatroi...

"Something wrong?" Meracle asked Crowe, who involuntarily shivered in revulsion.

"Huh?" Crowe snapped out of his daze. "It's nothing...we should check to see if Mikhail, Fionne and the others are all right."

Please...let those two children be safe...

They entered the house...and the situation was not at all pleasant. Tragedy had come and wrought its heartwrenching effect supon the home. The floor, walls, and windows of the house were covered with blood spatters, and worst of all, the unmistakable stench of death hung in the air. Chairs and tables were turned over, shattered glass littered the floor, and furniture was ripped to shreds.

Meracle gasped. "How...horrible..."

Crowe was just as shocked. Who or what could have done all this? Could it have been....him? Immediately, he remembered about Mikhail and Fionne. I have to make sure they're safe.

Looking around, he saw that Mikhail and Fionne's new father, William, was dead, lying in a pool of blood, his eyes still wide open in fear. What's more, their new mother, Alysia, was nowhere to be found, leading Crowe to conclude that she was kidnapped. Along the way, he immediately saw the body of a young, blonde boy lying there. Don't let it be Mikhail...please, he thought. He turned over the body and could not believe what he saw.

"Mikhail....!"

Meracle ran over to Crowe's side and saw the boy lying on the floor, unmoving, eyes remaining open even in death. "No..."

To Crowe, it was as if Edge had just died and Crowe was not there to listen to his final words. "Edge..." he said under his breath, solemnly. Kneeling down, he leaned over to Mikhail's body and shut the boy's eyes with his hand.

Edge...this boy...he reminded me so much of you...

Meracle walked around and saw another body -- a young girl's body. "Crowe! Come quick!" she cried.

Standing up, Crowe rushed to Meracle's side and saw that the person lying in another pool of blood was none other than Fionne. The girl's dress was soaked in blood seeping from a single, massive wound in her abdomen. Her eyes were closed, as if sleeping eternally. Crowe started to tremble. "Fionne..."

Reimi....

Meracle knelt down. "Poor girl..." She grasped Fionne's wrist and, feeling a pulse, gasped in confoundment.

"Meracle?"

"Crowe! ... She's alive!"

Crowe was astonished. "Hurry, Meracle, get Sarah! Maybe she can heal Fionne!" Maybe I won't be too late this time...maybe I'll be able to save you, Fionne...Reimi...

Meracle ran out of the house and toward the inn, which was not too far away. Crowe knelt down by Fionne's side, looking at her. Please hold on... He began to stand up when he heard her coming to.

"Uh...uhh..."

No...please, don't wake up just now....

Fionne slowly opened her eyes. "Crowe....is that you?" she asked.

Crowe immediately knelt back down and held the girl's hand. "Yes," he said,  smiling kindly but anxiously, his voice soft yet wavering.

"I'm so glad.....I could see you...one more time..." Fionne said.

"Just hold on, Fionne," Crowe replied, the expression on his face more serious. "I called a friend of mine over. She's going to heal you...you're gonna be fine."

"You...shouldn't have called her," Fionne said in a sad tone of voice.

What....?

"What are you saying, Fionne...?" Crowe began to stand up, planning to look for something to stop the blood loss. "Just hold on until--"

Fionne grasped Crowe's hand. "Please..."

"Huh?!" He turned toward her and knelt back down.

"Listen.....I shouldn't have lied that day....about what happened to my friend. See....he died....a year ago."

"What...?"

"When Mikhail, Marius and I were young............we made.........a promise...." Fionne said, weakly, her eyes starting to flood with tears.

"No...!" Crowe realized tears were gathering in his eyes as well.

"We promised....that we'd always be there for each other...........and now that both Mikhail and Marius are dead, if I went on...........living... without them.........I'd be.....a hypocrite...."

"Please....hold on...." Crowe was already starting to feel powerless, just like how he felt when Lucien died inside his spaceship two years ago and Crowe could do nothing to save him. At this moment, it was as if Reimi was dying in Crowe's arms and he could do nothing to save her, either.

"Listen....Crowe. Mikhail and I are both so glad we met you..........you're the nicest person we've ever met.......I now know that...... even though there are........ so many cruel people in this world, there...........are also....some kind people....like you...." Fionne blinked, her tears gushing from her eyes and flowing into the pool of blood she lay in.

"Don't die!!" Crowe shut his eyes, his tears falling uncontrollably and splashing onto Fionne's face. "You have to live...! Please....don't die...!!"

"I'm so sorry, Crowe..." She let go of Crowe's hand and reached out her own, blood-soaked hand to touch his face. "...but thank you...for all the memories........ we shared. And....I hope....you see your... friends again........ some....day....................." At that, she closed her eyes and breathed her last, her arm dropping back into the scarlet puddle with a faint splash.

"No...!" he whispered hollowly.

Just then, Meracle ran back into the house with Sarah. "Crowe!" She called out. "Where are you? Where's Fio--"

And then they only saw one thing that let them know they were too late. A single teardrop splashed into the pool of blood, making ripples in the scarlet liquid. They saw Crowe, holding Fionne's cold, blood-soaked, lifeless body tightly in his arms, crying silently, his tears falling like hail from his closed eyes.

"It can't...be......" Meracle said remorsefully.

"I'm sorry..." Sarah murmured.

"No..." Crowe said sorrowfully, opening his still-teary eyes. "It isn't your fault."

"Crowe..."

"If it was anyone's fault, it was mine for being selfish....for not being there when they needed someone the most...to protect them." He looked at the young girl who reminded him so much of Reimi, his vision blurred by the tears in his eyes, and thought, I think I now know how Faize must have felt when he saw that so many people he cared about died right before his eyes and he couldn't do anything to save them. He lay Fionne to rest on the ground gently. And it's true. I do feel powerless at this moment for letting these children die because of my carelessness. Even so, I don't want any sort of power or anything... I just want to make up for my mistakes. But I screwed up again....why must it be this way?

He stood up, and saw Mikhail and Fionne lying on the ground, dead, in pools of their own blood. For a brief moment,  he could see Edge and Reimi in the same state as the children, in his mind's eye. Edge....Reimi.... Crowe thought as he covered his mouth with his hand, his eyes starting to flood with tears once again. If I let anything terrible happen to you two, I wouldn't be able to forgive myself.... He glanced away and closed his eyes, causing salty tears to stream down his face.

All of a sudden, a voice broke the solemn silence. "Uhh..."

"Oh, my," Sarah said. She quickly ran over to the young woman, and saw that it was Arianna Chliette, Mikhail and Fionne's former caretaker. She was also wounded; however, the wound was not fatal. "Are you okay, Miss Arianna?" Sarah asked.

"Sarah....?

"Just hold on," Sarah said. "I'll heal you." Clasping her hands together, Sarah began to chant a symbol, and then said, "Faerie Light." A small light flew from Sarah's hands and onto Arianna's wound. Once the light landed on the wound, it began to close, and the bleeding stopped.

"She'll be fine now," Sarah said. "All she needs is some rest." She lifted Arianna up onto her back.

"...Sarah."

Sarah looked at Crowe. "Yes?"

Still looking down, Crowe said in a faint tone of voice, "When Arianna recovers....I would like to speak with her."

Sarah seemed quiet for a second, then replied, "Okay. I'll let you know when she's better."

"Thanks."

As Sarah carried Arianna back to the inn, Crowe thought, I'm glad in a sense...at least she's alive. At least.... I haven't failed completely....

Meracle walked over to Crowe. "Hey.....you feeling okay?"

"Huh?" Brushing his tears away, Crowe said in his normal tone of voice, "I'm fine....we should report this to whomever is in charge."

As Meracle and Crowe followed Sarah back to the inn, they ran into a familiar face at the town square.

"Lady Eleyna....?"

"Eleyna..." Crowe said. "What....what brings you here?"

"It's a long story," she replied. Seeing the troubled look on Crowe's face, she asked, "Is everything okay?"

"I....." I can't bear to tell her....not now. "I'm fine, Eleyna."

By the dim moonlight, Eleyna could see Crowe's hands covered in blood, and saw a blood stain on his face -- most likely from when Fionne touched Crowe's face, unbeknownst to Eleyna. "Is that....your blood?"

Crowe sighed. Looking at Eleyna for a split second, he then glanced away and quickly ran back to the inn, struggling to keep in control of himself.

"Crowe...!" Eleyna called out to him, but he kept running. She turned to Meracle, and asked, "Why is he...?"

Meracle sighed, and replied, "So much has happened....Crowe's been shaken up pretty badly. Even I don't know the whole story myself. Maybe he'll tell us." Eleyna and Meracle walked back toward the inn.

When they entered the room Meracle and Sarah were sharing, they saw Sarah kneeling down next to a bed Arianna was resting on. Eleyna asked Sarah, "Sarah....have you seen Crowe?"

"Yes, I have..." Sarah said, looking and sounding rather sad and serious. "He looked troubled....he said he was going to take a shower."

"I see...." Eleyna said, starting to walk out of the room. "Crowe's room is next to this one, correct?"

"Y-yes," Sarah said. "Why do you ask?"

"Trust me," Eleyna said. "Meracle...could you stay here with Sarah and Arianna? I just...want to talk to him....I want to make sure Crowe will be okay."

........

Looking at his reflection in the mirror for a moment, Crowe then disrobed and stepped into the shower. He shivered briefly, then sighed deeply as he felt the shower water trickle over his body. "It's...cold...." he murmured.

Cold...just like when I held Fionne in my arms after she... He shook his head. I can't let that get me down. I just have to move on....

When he glanced down, he could see the blood that was on his hands being washed away into the drainage. It was then that he felt his eyes well up with tears once again. Damn it....! Why...? ...It's as if I had killed Mikhail and Fionne...as if I had killed Edge and Reimi....with those words... He lay on the floor in such a way so that the water would wash away his tears, curled into a fetal position, and, closing his eyes, began to cry quietly once more.

If only I could just wash away my pain...my regret...my guilt.... It hurts....it hurts too much.

"Mikhail...Fionne..." he began to sob in a low tone of voice. "Please....forgive me...." He could feel his tears starting to gush from his eyes, giving off a faint warmth but quickly being washed away into the drain, as the frigid shower water rained relentlessly on his exposed, vulnerable body.

Is this what despair feels like...? To simply have all your hopes just evaporate into thin air?... Is there no hope for me...?

.....
It just so happened that Eleyna began to walk into Crowe's room, and heard him weeping in the shower. She walked outside the room and leaned against the wall. So that's how it is, she thought.  I had best wait....he seems to be in a lot of pain right now. She sighed. It's just as my augury predicted....this is only the first hardship he has to endure. Even so...I don't want him to have to suffer like this. I want to reach out to him...
....

After a while, Crowe stopped crying. How strange, he thought. The pain is gone...but...it feels like my very spirit itself has been shattered. I can't feel anything right now. I...I just can't. Slowly standing up, he turned off the water flow, dried himself off, dressed, bound his hair back up, and stepped outside of the shower room.

I guess now would be a better time, Eleyna thought. She began to walk into Crowe's room. "Crowe?"

When their eyes met, Eleyna saw the deep sadness in Crowe's aquamarine eyes, as if they held the very sorrow of the sea's depths within them. Even so, he sounded detached and dull when he replied, "Y...yes, Eleyna?"

"Why must you hide your true feelings from me...?" Eleyna asked.

"Huh!?" Crowe was very surprised by Eleyna's strange question.

"You know very well what I mean," Eleyna said, almost convictingly. "I can sense it in you....you're trying to shoulder a heavy burden without having to draw the concern of others to you. Something happened...am I right?"

Crowe began to tremble. "I guess...I can't hide anything from you..." He sat down on his bed, and Eleyna sat next to him.

Eleyna looked at Crowe, and could already see the sorrow burdening him, becoming manifest. "Crowe...?"

"I can't believe....indirectly, I actually wished for their death..." He clenched his hands, which were resting on his lap, into fists, and his tears began to fall again.

"What are you talking...?"

"Eleyna...I...." He turned to her, his eyes watery from his sadness. "If I had known...that their friend had died...if I knew that that was the last time I would see them alive...I...wouldn't have said that!" He began to sob. "I wouldn't have said that I wished they'd see their friend again... I....I feel so...hopeless....why did something like this have to happen?!"

Overcome by a great and inexplicable feeling, a feeling of compassion, Eleyna wrapped her arms around Crowe. Crowe drew closer to Eleyna, resting his head on her shoulder, and wept.

"It's not your fault, Crowe," Eleyna consoled him. "But still...you have to be strong. I am sure those children wouldn't want you to feel sad for what happened...so please...don't beat yourself up."

Drawing back and wiping away his tears, Crowe said, "You're right, Eleyna...thank you..."

As Eleyna walked over to the bed next to Crowe's, Crowe lay down in his own, and looked at the ceiling.

"Eleyna," Crowe said. "Will any more unnecessary sacrifices need to be made...will more people die?"

"I do not know," Eleyna replied. "But the next days...will be harder....but it's important you not give up. Only you can break this chain of sadness..."

"Thank you..." Crowe murmured, before falling asleep.

Still looking at Crowe, Eleyna pondered, I can see it in you, Crowe...you are strong, but you still suffer silently...I want to ease your suffering. Let me be by your side right now...

But the heart will remain
As a silhouette of time
Hear the ringing echoes
In the splitting horizon
Calling to the night....


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A/N: T______T This is just….oh my God, just… I can't believe how much I improved, and how emotional this chapter as a whole is….
So, we're officially at the halfway point now. What will happen next? I'll also try not to make the next chapters so delayed, since I am taking my final course in college after all! And I did turn 22 a few weeks ago…but no SO4 still. –sigh- One of these days, I tell you…
[link] (Prologue)
[link] (Chapter 1)
[link] (Chapter 2)
[link] (Chapter 3)
[link] (Chapter 4)
[link] (Chapter 5)
[link] (Chapter 6)
Chapter 7 (you are here)


Calling to the niiiiight....to dream...agaiiiiin in the light...:sing:

Sorry, couldn't resist ^^; I can't believe it's already here...God, it's so freaking sad. T____T

I'll add more info later, since this is kind of a post-and-run, but here's the essential...soundtrack to the chapter: [link]

(and yes, that is a snippet of the lyrics at the end.)
© 2011 - 2024 Riegella
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HolyCross9's avatar
That was awesome!  I hope you'll continue this story.